When life hands you lemons…

…You suck on that lemon like a champ and shove it in life’s face!

WOW. Where has the time gone? I can’t believe it’s November, let alone almost 2018.

2017 was supposed to be “my year” according to Oprah.

HA!

That’s funny. It definitely was anything but my year.

Oh what a year it has been though. Many things happened, while at the same time, nothing happened… crazy how life works that way.

I started off this year being so happy and confident. I was losing weight and I felt like I was getting somewhere.

Then I got a new job, started school again, and everything went, POOF.

I fell off the wagon for the millionth and one time. I however, just kept that wagon rolling down the hill, not bothering to stop it and get back on. Isn’t that the saddest part of it all? How you go for so long, watching what you eat, working out, and really having the motivation to get to your dream self? Oh man, how that dream crashed and burned. I got so into my life – school and work – that I put everything else to the back burner and really just let it burn.

Do you ever find yourself thinking in the car or the shower or even right before you fall asleep at night, all the things you wish you’d do differently? I find myself thinking at all of those times (really the most terrible times when I really can’t do anything about what I’m thinking about anyways…) that I’m going to get up early and workout, or I’m going to go to the gym once I get home and get some steps in… or I’m going to make something fabulous for dinner and it’s going to be weight watchers friendly… Those moments slowly pass by and the thoughts go along with for the ride. Life continues on in the same fashion it always does, and I never get to the gym, or make a fabulous meal, or get up early to work out.

Does that happen to you? It must, because I KNOW I’m not the only one out there going through all this. I just know it. Don’t deny it!

The problem is, most people don’t put this stuff out there for others to read about. No one wants to read about someone else struggling in life. They want to see the before and after shots of the person all happy as a clam in their new bodies. They want to see the after shots and imagine that it’s their own after shots. They want to dream that it really could happen to them. Trust me people, I’m talking about myself here!

The other day I was reminiscing about a time I was dusting – *insert laugh here because I HATE DUSTING* – and I was listening to stories of weight watcher members losing their weight. I remember clear as day some of the people and how they said it took them years to lose the weight. I remember thinking, wow it’s going to take me at least two years to get anywhere… and then I felt so defeated.

WHAT THE HELL AUBRIE.

SERIOUSLY.

This was at least two years, if not more ago, and if I would have kept on going, I would be somewhere by now. I think that’s what I’m most mad at right now. The fact that I stopped and I could have been there, but in fact I got worse, and now even further away. Obesity is a fickle b.

My godmother’s daughter, but honestly I think of her as my little sister since she’s younger than me and I’ve known her, her whole life, has been gaining weight the past couple of years, due to the fact that she’s hurt her knee, had surgery, and now hurt it again and has to have surgery on it, again. I see so much of my younger self in her. I want to pull her aside and tell her that she can’t go down this same path I did. I don’t want her to get to a point in her life where she hates herself for what she’s done to her body. I want her to face her fears and get back to the gym when she finally can. I want her to never have someone look at her and the first thing that comes to mind is “are they thinking I’m too fat?”

Being fat sucks.

It sucks what it does to your mind. It sucks what it does to your life.

BUT…

It’s something we can ALL overcome.

We can get through this.

We can fight it and we can win.

So again I say… When life gives you lemons?

You suck on that lemon like a champ, and shove it.

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